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references to abuse
[262 words]
Go hide in a reach-in closet. Pillows lined up against the wall.
Have you ever pressed your cheek against the wall?
Yoga legs means you fit yourself anywhere. Front split against the wall.
Has anyone ever pressed your cheek
against the wall?
V-split across the vertical diagonal. Split in the closet. Backbend on the linoleum. Hanging clothes caress your belly. Hanging clothes brush your hair. No pillows, your head hits the floor.
Has anyone ever pressed your cheek
against the floor?
Cheeks like pillows like carpet. Squishy, cotton balls.
Have you ever filled the inside of
your cheeks with cotton balls?
Sweet like cotton candy. Burns the throat like cotton candy.
Have you ever turned the
other cheek when someone
pressed your cheek
against the floor?
Cotton soaks your rusty spit.
Have you ever had rusty cotton candy?
Are you flexible? Very. Wall headstand in the closet. Pillow under the head. Wrists twisted, repelling gravity. Cheeks chubby with cotton balls.
Have you ever spit out rusty cotton candy?
Have you ever—
Have you ever—
Knees to chest. Legs over the head. Toes against the wall. One closet, ten toes. Plough paused. Grip your lower back. Shoulders down. Cheeks clenched in the air.
Have you ever swallowed a piece of your cheek when
someone pressed your cheek
against the floor?
Pose like a child against the wall. Nose down. Shins down. Vertical sajdah. Rise up. Free fall in the closet. Head landing onto a pillow. Pillowy cheeks against the pillows.
Has anyone ever laid their cheek against your cheek like it’s a pillow?
Sevde Kaldiroglu is a creative writer and marketer from Istanbul. She holds a BA in English and a minor in Psychology from Stanford University. Her recent prose has appeared in Idle Ink, The River, The Coachella Review, and The Rising Phoenix Review, and her short story was a finalist for the Pleiades 2021 Kinder/Crump Award. She is the Founder and Executive Director of Bereket Writers, a global writing organization centering marginalized writers.
